Thursday, August 23, 2012


The day I've been trying to avoid has come. My husband has been accused of giving me preferential treatment. (We are in the same department).

When a married couple is in the same department, nepotism, or whatever the word for it is (marriagism), is waiting at the line. There is an unofficial policy of married folks not serving on the same committees, and I completely agree with that. But there are some instances where the idea of favoritism comes inching in. Suppose that the husband or wife is in charge of allotting resources, TA support, class assignments, etc. Reasonably, he or she should have a second party review the proposed decision before signing off on it (which is what Mr. JP did).

But, faculty like to complain. And when faculty don't get what they want, they tend to go after the lowest hanging fruit or the sorest spot in terms of complaining. So now, I have been named, in writing, by an angry faculty member as a recipient of favoritism from my husband. (Honestly, the idea of him favoring me for anything makes me raise my eyebrows). Presently, this is being handled by the department head, who is smart enough to see what is really happening.

The whole thing makes me uncomfortable because I have to interact with this angry faculty member for possibly years to come. They do not know that I am aware of their accusations. I can't look at them the same way.

1 comment:

Anonymous said...

Wow - this sounds so uncomfortable for you (and I guess your husband as well). It's probably especially frustrating in light of how much you feel you've had to emotionally support and take care of your husband lately. I have my fingers crossed for you that this will fade quickly and not leave an indelible mark on your inter-departmental relationships. Please let us know how this turns out - I'm starting a position as part of dual-career couple and I imagine I'll face this sooner or later as well.